LIFE IS DYNAMIC

Had a phone conversation with my dad last week and he was like, "Nne, when are you coming home for Christmas?" and I was like, "I don't know yet dad. If I will come back at all, it will be towards 29th or 31st of December". And he just said, "Okay, let me know when you make up your mind". That was a weird answer, coming from my dad of all people. I remembered when i was still in the university, his usual response will typically be - "Chisom, I don't know what it is you are talking about, I will need you to come back home before 22nd. I will be taking everybody to village on the 22nd!!!!!!!!” 

It stuck me; things change, life change, people grow up and conditions evolve. Life is dynamic. Life is in constant flux, no condition remains permanent. 

I remember;

· When with N20, I could get a loaf of bread and a bottle of Limca or Gold spot (whoever remembers this drink, lol).

 When a piece of Tom-tom sweet was N1 (coin). Lol. .

· When a Milo bar being sold for 50kobo/one. 

· When there was no sachet water and people sold ice water tied in nylons for just N1.

Nothing in life is ours except the essential things – air, sleep, dreams, the sea, the sky – all things tending towards the eternal or what we imagine of it .  Too many people hang their happiness on achieving things in life. Having a bigger car. A safe job. Bigger salary. An attractive partner. Happy, content people understand it’s not about reaching the goal. For me it has always been about the process towards a goal. Living in a world of possibilities.

“Life is not always perfect. Like a road, it has many bends, ups and down, but that’s its beauty.” - Amit Ray.

One minute you had it all planned out and you feel you are in control of what is going to happen for the next 1 day, 1 week, 1 month and even 1 year. The budgets are well calculated and mapped out, your plans for your family/kids all well structured. To you, I have got it all figured out.

The next minute;  You fall in love, fuel prices crashed, Forex rates increased, inflation followed suit, devaluation happens, someone important dies, a friend/spouse loses his/her job, work becomes tougher because of the economic challenges,  your spouse cheats on you, your child comes home with a poor result, somebody stole your car, MMM crashed and you lost a huge amount of money. Suddenly, it doesn't look like things are going to go as planned.

What do you do when you had things all planned and things changed along the line? Do you give up? Or do you find new ways to adapt to the changes?. The easiest thing is for us to give up, but I say no, because life is dynamic. Depending on our paradigm about the situations, things will eventually turn out well.  These changes are the spice of life. If everything was as we expected, then life would be so boring. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying I wish for bad things to happen, the truth is that some things are not within our circle of influence, we cannot control some situations and changes in our lives, we can, however, control how we react to them or how we feel about them.  So, changes will come, maybe not to us but to people we care about . Things change everyday. What matters is what we do about them. Do we learn from the bad ones and move on, do we pause our life to dwell on what has happened or do we change our paradigm, redefine our conditions to adapt to the ones we can’t change. It’s up to us.

I think the most important thing is to be present at all times (I don’t mean bodily present), entirely present at every point and stage of our lives. Enjoy life to the fullest  and make the best out of every opportunity because some opportunities come once in a lifetime. Focus on things that are within our circle of influence, to ensure every moment was maximized fully;

Þ Keep up with your hobbies No matter how bored it might be to the next person, to your colleagues and your friends. It is what you are wired to enjoy. You are not the same as everybody, hence, you are not wired to like things that everybody likes. I bet the people that invented basketball and all forms of leisure activities weren’t looking for what everybody liked. It’s what they loved. Be engaged in your favorite activities. Investing a few hours in your hobby is like giving food to your brain and soul.

Þ Overcome your fear Are you scared of walking in the dark? Are you scared of trying sky diving? Overcome your fears and tread on unfamiliar paths. Harbor confidence to venture into the unknown and conquer your fears. Try new things and explore new possibilities. If you fail, get up and keep trying until you perfect at that thing.

Þ Be a student for life Do you believe that if you stop learning, you’re virtually dead? Life is a teacher which doesn’t see barriers of age or time. Seek knowledge from every possible source that you can and constantly enrich yourself. See every opportunity as an opportunity to learn. Constantly assess situations/people’s experiences and add one or two things to yourself. Learn new thing, one word every. Read, read explore. Learn !! Learn !!! Learn !!!!!!!.

Þ Make friends out of everybody  Not all of us are perfect at this. Some people have an “A” grade at this, i don't fall in that category at it either. I am worst at it. But we need to try to do it at our own pace. The truth is that, not everyone is going to end up being your friend. Some people have values that are different from yours, don’t force it. But are you going try and make friends out of everybody; YES!!!!!!!. Please try. Be nice to people, be kind to everyone, express your feelings with respect, value people’s times and attention. Call your friends and catch up with them. Say “Thank you” always and appreciate people when they have helped you.  At the end, people who are meant to be your friend will come and stay.

Þ Strive for commitment Honor your commitments, whether it is for a relationship or for a task to be completed, your children, your friends, your parents or your spouse.  You will never see substantial outcomes in your life if you don’t keep your commitments.

Þ Get rid of negativity  Are there people  or situations that are stopping you from living your full potential by inducing negative thoughts in your mind? Get away from them as quickly as you can. Surround yourself with positive people, positive thoughts and positive energy. Change your paradigm about different situations. Be in charge of your thoughts and view about life.

Þ Do everything that you always wanted to do. Do you know that the biggest secret to living a fulfilled life is to actually execute all your ideas that you never found the time for? It could be anything like cross country backpacking, learning an archaic language, growing your own vegetable garden, building a snow castle, going skydiving or joining a dance class! No matter how crazy it sounds, It’s time to take control over your life and find time to do everything you have always wanted to do. A lot of people say there’s no time, the truth is that there’s never enough time. We need to create the time for things to happen.